Congratulations to Ashley Lee, Week 7's Finalist, who won a $500 Spa Vacation Getaway for Valentine's Day! Thanks to all who voted and who participated in the contest! I hope you never get cheated on again, and I hope you enjoy reading Marissa and Trent's story in TO CATCH A CHEAT! ~ Kelley St. John

Week 1 (Aug 20):  When I was 18, I got back with my first love (we first dated when I was 14) and everything was great. He was always at my house and doing great things for me, until he tells me that while we broke up he got another girl in Ohio pregnant. That was fine, because I myself had a baby when we broke up over a year before. Well, he proposed to me and told me he wanted to raise my son as his. Everything was great between us. That was September of 98. In December of 98, my friend calls me to tell me she went into labor and saw HIM at the hospital. She would not tell me why, just that he was going to call me and tell me something important. I kept begging her to tell me, but she said no—he had to tell me by 3:00 pm or she would. Well, he ended up calling in a few minutes later and told me what was going on. His other girlfriend was in labor right here in INDIANA not OHIO. She was living with him the whole time, and I had no clue. I was so mad and upset. I didn't know what to say. He kept telling me he loved me and he never meant to lie. He wanted me so bad is what he kept saying. Needless to say, I said some very nasty things to him and did not talk to him for a month. He then started calling me telling me he loved me and wanted me back. He was even telling his friends and mine to call me to get us back together. I was devastated and if it wasn't for my son, I think I would have done something crazy. I still think about him and what would have happened if that girl wasn't in the picture. He was my first love.

Week 2 (Aug 27):  This happened in the late 70's or early 80’s. I was dating a guy that broke it off with his fiancee and then I found out they got back together, behind my back. Thankfully I caught them the same night they got back together...I got off work early and went to his place, and found me a big surprise. I didn't have to get back at him or even wish for revenge...he got his own comeuppance. He called me a couple of weeks later and said I needed to get checked for VD because he had it now and it was my fault. I went to the doctor and found out (thank God)I didn't have VD...what a relief and a wake up call. Maybe it was wrong of me but I sure took great pleasure in calling him back and telling him he needed to check his fiancee because it sure wasn't me that had it!

Week 3 (Sept 3):   In high school I was dating a guy for a couple months. A friend of his came to me one day because he wanted me to know...here's how the story goes. They had gone out driving around with a girl and ended up with another girl. Two girls. Two guys. I guess my boyfriend (at the time) was in the back seat with the other girl...and they started making out. Guess he decided that he was over me and into the other girl. HE didn't tell me, though——I found out from his friend. And SHE didn't tell me...she was my BEST friend!!!!! I was shocked and mad! I didn't talk to her for a week or so, and then thought——"He's not worth our friendship." The guy cheats...yep. The girl lies...yep. Got them both covered!!!!!

Week 4 (Sept 10):  My boyfriend said he was going to a conference in New York. He even called me several times from New York to tell me how the conference was going, how much he missed me, and all of that. He was in New York, but he wasn’t at a conference, and he wasn’t alone. He had another girl with him. She heard him calling me, and then she ended it with him. I ended it with him too, consequently, and he’ll never have to worry about either of us again.

Week 5 (Sept 17):  I had been dating the same guy for three years, and things weren’t going so great. I met someone else who was very nice, and I was interested, but I told him that I didn’t want to cheat on my boyfriend. We had both been traveling a lot, and I thought things would get better when we were both in the same town. Finally we stopped traveling so much and spent more time together, but we just didn’t get along anymore. I kept thinking about the other guy, but I wanted to end things right with my boyfriend before I talked to the new guy again. I didn’t want to cheat. Then I told him that it wasn’t going to work out, and he told me that he’d been seeing someone else for nearly a year. The reason he was acting so weird was because HE was cheating on me.

Week 6 (Sept 24):  My boyfriend was taking me on a vacation to the Bahamas. We got in an argument right before we were supposed to go, and he said he was cancelling the trip. But he didn’t cancel it. He went with someone else, even though he still hadn’t broken things off with me. I found out while he was gone and never spoke to him again, but it still hurts to think about what he did.

Week 7 (Oct 1):  I was injured in a car accident and was in the hospital for two weeks. My husband and I were separated, but he came to the hospital and we decided to work things out. But by the time I got out of the hospital, those plans were over. He met a nurse at the hospital and ended up moving in with her. He's now my ex-husband.

Week 8 (Oct 8):  My boyfriend asked me to the prom. I bought the dress, made appointments to have my hair, makeup and nails done and everything. Then, the night before, we got into an argument and he said he wanted to go with someone else from another school and was going to take her instead. I went to the prom without a date, but I had a good time anyway. He looked miserable with the other girl and that made me feel better too.

Week 9 (Oct 15):  Mine happened a few years ago, I was dating this guy and I thought he was great. You know the story of he was the hottie in school and I was not and he had no clue that I existed. Well one night I got a phone call from him and he wanted some information on an organization that I was in, and we ended up talking for 4 hours that night on the phone. It was wonderful, I was so shocked that he wanted to go out with someone like me (low self-esteem). So we dated for about a year and we had our ups and downs just like any other couple. One night I was having a girls-night-out party at my house and I just felt "off" the whole night, so I went by his house and it was dark so I went home. Well the next day I was there surfing on the net and wanted to use one of his floppy disks that he had to download some information on, well it was full so I was looking at it (who wouldn't??). And much to my suprise......it was full of pictures of his EX-WIFE and him having an interesting evening the night before!!!! He dated the disks and that was how I knew when it had happened!!!! I was really hurt and he was like that is what you get for snooping!!! Well I am glad I snooped then and not years down the road when it would have been much worse!!!!

Week 10 (Oct 22):  I had been dating my boyfriend for over a year when we got engaged. Then one day while he was in class I happened to wander into his kitchen and see a bill for overdue child support!

I broke it off with him at dinner that night, although he did not want it to end. It wasn't the fact of the child...it was the concealment...how could I have trusted him?

Week 11 (Oct 29):  This is told from the boy's side of a rather twisted romance.

We've been together for about two months. I knew it would be hard to keep up a secretive long distance relationship, but the girl was hot and she was into me. She had this strange idea that she had to sneak around to date. I told her honesty was the best policy if she wanted her parents to trust her at all. She disagreed, and that should have warned me off.

We didn't get to see each other much, but when we did, it was magical. Everything about her was perfect, until I ran into her MySpace profile. Maybe she didn't think I would ever look at her profile, maybe she didn't think one of her best friends would betray her secret, but either way, I caught her cheating a lying to me.

She told her friends we went out every weekend to fancy restaurants, movies and concerts. In reality, we never actually went out on a date. We hooked up at athletic events and our big date was concession stand food at a stadium.

One of the weekends we "went out" she told her local boyfriend she was staying by her dying cousin's bedside. He was brain-dead from an IED explosion in Iraq and not expected to live. Same weekend, she was spending the night with a friend, out on the town with me, doing all sorts of things. Reality, she was so imprisoned by her own lies she could not even leave her own house.

Confronted with these bits of information, she insisted I was making a big deal out of nothing, claiming she loved me and couldn't sleep at night unless she cried herself to sleep a the thought of losing me. I might sound cold, but I dumped her anyway. I know both her cousins, and neither served in the military.

Week 12 (Nov 5):  I thought my life was wonderful. I had a husband and after several years of trying to get pregnant a beautiful baby girl. My husband was career military and we had been living in Germany. That summer my husband was going to a 13 week school in the US and I decided to go home for the summer and visit my family. So my 14 month old daughter and I traveled home (thanks to the goodness of my family buying us a ticket).

The summer visit was wonderful. I enjoyed my family and talked daily to my husband by email. When the summer ended, I made plans to return to Germany a few days behind my husband so he could pick me up at the airport. I was all packed and ready to go to the airport the next day. Checking my email late that night, I eagerly opened an email from my husband. I missed him so much and couldn’t wait to see him.

As I began to read, disbelief and pain hit me like a kick in the stomach. In an EMAIL, my husband, the father of my beautiful child informed me that he had met someone while at this school and that he didn’t want me to return to Germany. He wanted me to stay in the states with my family. He had been having an affair with her for the entire summer while sending me daily love emails. However, he didn’t even have the guts to tell me in person that he wanted out of our marriage.

Week 13 (Nov 12):  I started work at an Air Force Base and on the first day I had to get my I.D. card from the Civilian Guard Chief. When we met, it was love at first sight--at least for me. I thought it was for him, too. We began dating and I was really in love. Then I found out that he had been dating my best friend at the office and had dumped her when he met me. Shortly after that, I had emergency major surgery and was in terrible pain after the surgery. One of the nurses on the floor came to my bedside to tell me that she was now going out with my so-called love, and that he didn't want to see me again. Besides being in constant pain, I was devastated. I know it reads like a bad soap opera, but it really happened. I wonder how many more women he dumped, every time he met a new one. I also hope that nurse, who had the compassion of a dead mouse, got dumped as well.

Week 14 (Nov 19):  I was recently separated from my husband of 10 years when I went for a rare night out with my friends. I was 32 at the time and I met this handsome younger man at the bar we ended up at. He came to our table and we talked the night away. He asked me to come to a party afterward, but I declined because my then 7 year old daughter was home with a babysitter and I didn't feel comfortable in being out so late. We exchanged numbers, but I really didn't expect to hear from him again, after all, he was 8 years younger than I was. He called the next night and asked me if he could come over. I hesitated, but gave in and said ok, because he was bringing a friend along. That made me feel a little more comfortable. I really clicked with this younger man. He was charming, polite, and seemed to really like kids. We continued to see each other regularly after that, in spite of our age differences and lifestyle differences. He liked to party and I was a little shy and only felt comfortable with people I knew well. I wasn't much of a party girl. After being together for 3 months, I found out I was pregnant, and that was the last thing I needed at that time in my life. (Don't get me wrong, I love my child, a son, who was born as a result.) We had used protection, but obviously, something went wrong. We didn't live together at that time. He lived in a city nearby, with his brother and they partied constantly. He was supportive of my pregnancy, however. I couldn't see us being a family though, we were just too different. A month before our son was born, he did move in with us, we decided we wanted to give it a try. He stopped partying so much, and when our son was born, he was a wonderful dad. He would bath our baby and change diapers and help out with the household chores and even cooking when I was tired. Things were going well and we were a happy family. We talked about having another baby, so that they would be close in age, and hopefully close siblings as well. I had to have a cesarean section when our son was born, so I talked to my doctor and asked if it was safe to try to get pregnant again. He said it would be fine. At this time, our son was 3 months old, and almost immediately, I was pregnant again. 9 months later, we had another son, again by cesarean section. We now had sons who were both born in July and just under a year apart. Again, he was great with the kids, helping out all the time. Then when my youngest son was 3 months old, my boyfriend had to go out of town for work, likely for about 3 months, but assured me he would be home on weekends. He did come home on weekends at first, but he started making excuses and was partying and drinking again. I began to suspect he was cheating, and it gnawed at me. He assured me he was being faithful. The kids and I went to the city he was working for a weekend. He had an apartment there. I found notes from girls, and girls would call and hang up when I answered the phone. He always came up with a lame excuse. One day, I found someone to watch my  kids and paid him a surprise visit. A girl called for him when he was at work. I confronted him and he admitted he was cheating. I was crushed. We argued and he threw me out. I had my bus ticket and $10 and the bus depot was a long way. I took a taxi and about halfway to the bus depot, the meter on the taxi was at $10. I was a mess and it was obvious that I had been crying. I told the taxi driver he would have to let me out there because that was all the money I had. He kindly took me the rest of the way without extra charge. He felt sorry for me I guess. I cried for days. We were apart for a year when we finally started talking again. We decided to give it another try, but he still had to work out of town. He assured me he'd never cheat again and that he had given up drinking and partying. I was afraid, but I agreed to give it another shot. About 4 months later, he was home on a weekend and the phone rang. A lady asking for him... I asked her who she was and why was she calling my boyfriend. She swore at me and screamed "He's my boyfriend bitch!" There I was again, heartbroken, hurt and alone to raise my kids. Why did I ever trust him again? Once a cheater, always a cheater! I learned the hard way....

If a partner ever cheats, don't take them back! Don't believe their empty promises! Take it from someone who knows....

Week 15 (Nov 26):  I guess at some point we all get burned. I fell into an actual fire pit when I was 6 years old. I think I handled that better than "getting burned emotionally." I was dating a really "great guy," a single, nice, caring guy. There was no wedding ring on his finger, and he was available anytime to go out. So imagine my surprise when someone else saw us on a "date" and informed me that he was not only married but also the daddy to four young children. Wow! I had quite a catch! A double cheater. He was not only cheating on his wife with me, but he was cheating on me with his wife. He did not deny it when I confronted him about it. I felt like an idiot, but I was thankful at the same time. I did not want revenge, I just wanted him to go away (well maybe a little revenge would have been nice,, like driving a tractor over his head) I never want to be the "other woman." I will never forget him trying to get me to take him  back, I burst out laughing in his face. I guess that was kinda mean but boy did he have some nerve. I have no clue if they are still together, and I have not seen him in years. I am happily married and the mommy of the cutest 2y/o little girl. Thank goodness I finally found a "Keeper."

Week 16 (Dec 3):  I don't even know if you will believe this. I hardly believe it myself and it happened to me....

When I was in high school I met and boy who would soon become my first love. We dated for a whole year and then suddenly he ended it. Throughout the years we would be off and on and off and on. Almost 8 years later he contacts me. He tells me how much he loved me and missed me and how we should have always been together. At this point I had moved out of the state and I wasn't sure I wanted to be with him. We talked on the phone for hours. We laughed and joked and had amazing conversations. Finally I decided that I had to know if I was meant to be with him. I got a plane ticket and flew out and spent an amazing weekend with him. I laid in his arms and completely fell for him all over again. He was my first and only love. I suppose it was easy to fall for him. He told me how much he cared for me and how he had always wanted to be with me. At the airport when I left he cried and begged me to stay with him. I was heartbroken to leave but I figured it would work itself out. He asked me to be his girlfriend. We made plans for him to move out and be with me in the near future. What is a couple of months long distance right?

So I flew home and we continued to talk on the phone. Then he got really sick and ended up in the hospital. His sister contacted me and kept me up to date on everything. I didn't talk to him for almost three weeks while all this was going on. When he got out of the hospital he called me and told me that he had pancreatic cancer and that the doctors had said there was nothing they could do for him. I cried myself to sleep for two weeks trying to figure out what to do. What was I going to do? I finally get the love of my life back and he has cancer and is going to die in two years. After weeks I finally decided that when you love someone, you love them with everything they are. It wasn't his fault he had cancer and I loved him so I would have to deal with the road ahead.

After that I stopped hearing from him. He said he lost his job and got his phone cut off. Considering I was half way across the country I had no way to really contact him. A few weeks rolled by and he called me finally. We got into a fight over the phone and I pleaded with him to contact me more. I told him that I couldn't do this anymore, that I needed to know if he was okay and I needed to talk to him more then every three weeks. He told me that he put an emergency contact list in his wallet and that if anything happened to him that someone would let me know.

A few days go by and no phone call. Then a few weeks. Then two months. I was really frustrated and I had no way to get ahold of him. I feared something horrible had happened. I would contact his sister and she would tell me he was fine. I wrote a letter telling him this wasn't going to work and the only way I would know that he loved me was if he showed up on my door step. I told him that if he didn't contact me by a certain date then I would consider myself single. I also told him that I deserved to know that he didn't want to be with me instead of ignoring me. I heard nothing. The date for our "break-up" came and went. The whole time I was depressed and upset. I would just cry because I couldn't figure out what was going wrong.

One Monday morning I came into work and got this message in an email...

"Listen... my name is so and so and I was a friend of Your boyfriend's... he asked me to say something to you... He told me to tell you that he loved you with all his heart and soul. He said that you made him complete, you were his all. I feel so bad to do this over an email but, your boyfriend passed away. He got really sick and went into a hospice. And he fought until he couldn't hold on. I am really sorry, He loved you sooo much he would cry when he couldn't remember your number or he couldn't talk anymore to tell you that he loved you so much. I'm so sorry that this is the only way for me to contact you.... Sorry."

I lost it completely. I cried so hard I couldn't see the screen. I tried to call his sister but she was out of town. I left messages with her roommate and sent her an email. I went home and laid in bed and cried. I got up the next morning and didn't even put make up on, I just dragged myself to work. I tried to get some things done but all I could do was cry at my desk. I noticed a message from his sister and immediately opened it. She told me that he was fine and that she had spent the whole weekend with him. We wrote back and forth while I was at work. She told me that she was so sorry this was happening. She recanted of how he had asked her to tell me he was dead because he had met someone else. When she refused, he decided to have do it himself. She apologized profusely and told me that he had met this girl right after being in the hospital. She told me that she had begged him to tell me the truth and said that she wouldn't have gotten involved but that she knew I was a really good person and that I really loved her brother. She also confirmed for me that he didn't have cancer, that too was a part of his elaborate lie. He didn't have the guts to tell me he was cheating on me so he told me he was dead instead.

I hope he and his new chick are happy. Hopefully he doesn't die anytime soon. He might break her heart too.

Week 17 (Dec 10):  I was seventeen years old and pregnant by a guy I was totally in love with.  I was young, pregnant and totally convinced that this "man" was going to make all of my teenaged dreams come true.  Halfway through my pregnancy things started to get a little weird.  He would go for days without calling me and would ignore all of my phone calls.  He had gotten a new job and was partying all of the time with new friends, but his mother convinced me that he was just "sowing his wild oats" because we were so young and he was going to be a dad.  Well, a few months later when I was nine months pregnant, I was still having these problems with my boyfriend, so I took a walk and went to his job to visit him, hoping he would be surprised and happy to see me.  Not only was he not surprised, he left me sitting in the waiting room of his job for almost an hour while he went in the back room and "stocked shelves" with a female employee.  After almost an hour I walked home and cried all the way there, trying to figure out what as wrong with me- I was so ridiculously naive.  I was so in love with him that when he called later and told me that he was stocking shelves, I actually believed him, not actually putting two and two together.  Well, the game was up a couple of weeks later when I dropped our nine day old baby off at his mom's house.  Not only had he not called me for a week, since we had had the baby but when he came downstairs to get our daughter from my car, he had hickeys all over his neck from another girl!  That was almost ten years ago, but the pain of that entire situation is something that will always stay with me, even if I have moved on with my life. 

Week 18 (Dec 17):  I do not know which is worse. To find out your bf cheats by accident or to have him admit it to you.

  I never thought my ex-bf will ever cheat on me (yeah, who does think of that) especially since he has been cheated on before and he has sworn he will never ever do that to his gf. But guess what, life is never what you expect it to be. I was away on holiday (he could not join me due to work commitments) and we called each other daily and emailed occasionally. Then the call - "we should break up". It was total bewilderment on my part. I kept asking why, what happened, and he finally admitted that he was seeing another girl while I was away. They had been on two dates and he wanted more, but he thought he should break up with me first before continuing with the girl.

  To say my heart broke to smithereens was an understatement. It was a period of darkness and total incapacity to do anything except mope and cry. I lost 3kgs within 3 days as I could not eat at all. It got worse as I refused to eat and had to see a counselor to help me get over it. The counselor also made me realize that the eating issue was an reaction to the feeling that I had lost control of my life. It was thanks to my friends and family who were concerned enough to make me aware of my actions and what I was doing.

  The breakup also cost me a hefty sum due to the changing of my return flight plans and long distance phone bills. Yes, I was foolish enough to do everything which all women in love did. I cut short my holiday and tried to work things out. It didn't happen, but a week later he called, and apologized again and asked me to take him back. Silly me did as I still love him then and we tried to make the relationship worked. I forgave his actions as I understood why he did what he did but I could never forget the incident and pains it brought. So in the end, it didn't work out. We are no longer in touch and till now, I am still single (4 years and counting). I did date, but it never came to a relationship. I am not sure if I can fully trust or love a guy like I did for my ex.

Week 19 (Dec 24):  Well, I guess it started when I was dating my future ex-husband. (I am happily married now!) We were dating and I found out he was seeing his ex-live-in girlfriend. Of course I forgave him and took him back. After we were married I caught him cheating with another girl, luckily if he called out a name while having meaningless sex, it would be okay because she and I had the same name! Stupid, I took him back again. Another girl came into the picture, no not the same name girl another one. Once again, stupid.....once again.....another girl, but with the same name as me and the other one!! So, luckily I got out this time...after some abuse, but hey.......I am happy now with a wonderful man that would never do anything to hurt me!!!

Week 20 (Dec 31):  I went to my company Christmas party, where my husband and I spent a large portion of the night dancing with our best friends. I worked with the husband, and he and his wife had become close to us. We took vacations together, played cards together, and all of that. What I didn’t know (and what her husband didn’t know) is that my husband and his wife were seeing each other behind our backs.

At the Christmas party, she was drinking and evidently forgot where she was when dancing with my husband and started kissing him. Everything came out that night, and we’ve divorced. The two of them have now married, and I don’t know if I’ll ever trust a man again. I’m thinking I’d just as soon not.

Congratulations to all of the finalists!